Remember the time?

Oh, gosh. 'How am I supossed to pretend, I never want to see you again'
I'm in deep trouble.
You have no idea of how much I wanted... today... of how much I actually wanted you. It's been a while since the last time I longed for something so dreadfully, it´s not like now.
Everyday I tell myself I will not let myself fall for you but everytime I see you, my heart pounds so hardly on my chest it nearly hurts & then, when our eyes meet my heart skips a beat & you leave me breathless.

I know I promised I would never hurt you, I told you you´d be first, you´d be the first to break my heart & I think I was right.
I've been breaking apart since last time we talked, you know, I feel like I´ve lost something, something that was the main part of myself but then again, how can you lose something that has never been yours? How can I lose you If you were never mine?
I try to convice myself about the fact that we both belong to each other, you belong to me, I belong to you. Maybe I´m old school but I remember you telling me that there could be no 3rd person between us, & then...?
I used to feel your lips brushing mine's all the time, your sweet fragance, you, tracing your fingers along my skin, brushing my cheeks... but now I don´t want to remember, I don´t even want to feel anything at all, I wish I´d have no memories of you because I fell so hard for you & It hurts to think that you don´t even care.
But let´s be realistic...